Mother Teresa, who devoted her life to service to the poor, referred to loneliness as “the most terrible poverty.”

The loss of a close friend or loved one, a move to a new area, retirement — these are just a few situations that can trigger intense feelings of loneliness. While the emotion is a common struggle, especially during certain points in life, much has been uncovered in recent years about its profound health effects.

A lack of connection

Are you lonely? Odds are you might experience a feeling of isolation or disconnectedness from time to time. In a 2010 AARP survey, 35 percent of respondents reported feeling lonely. And close to half of the lonely group indicated that their loneliness had persisted for six years or longer.

Experts suggest that we may experience loneliness now more than ever.

Despite advances in technology that allow us to be ever increasingly connected — think cellphones, email and social media — these conveniences may take the place of face-to-face time and may inhibit the development of truly deep connections.

A greater risk than obesity?

An occasional bout of loneliness is normal, especially in the face of life-changing situations. But when it persists, it can have profound effects on your body. In fact, research has suggested that the effects of loneliness may be worse for you than carrying around extra pounds — increasing your chances of premature death by 14 percent.

It may not be surprising that loneliness affects your mental health, often going hand in hand with depression.

But the effects don’t stop there. One recent study associates feelings of loneliness with an increased risk of developing dementia in later life. Another shows that lonely people are subjected to fragmented sleep — a factor that’s significant due to the profound impact of quality sleep on your health.

Feelings of isolation also may trigger changes that increase inflammation in your body. This, in turn, may exacerbate inflammatory conditions such as arthritis and heart disease.

Loneliness lifters

Are you simply destined to be lonely? Of course not. But if it’s something you genuinely want to change, it may require you to step out of your comfort zone. That applies whether you’re building up existing relationships or creating new ones.

Friendships do require effort. But the enjoyment and comfort friendship can provide makes the investment worthwhile. To nurture your friendships:

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Reach out

— An unexpected phone call or email, even just to say hello, is a meaningful gesture.

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Be positive

— Think of friendship as an emotional bank account. Make deposits of kindness and approval, keeping in mind that criticism and negativity draw down the account.

Nonstop complaining also puts a strain on a friendship.

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Listen up

— Ask what’s going on in your friends’ lives. Let people know you’re paying close attention through eye contact, body language and reaffirming comments. When friends share details of hard times they are experiencing, be empathetic.

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Extend and accept invitations

— Invite a friend to join you for coffee or lunch. When you’re invited to a social gathering, say yes. Contact someone who recently invited you to an activity and return the favor.

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Respect boundaries

— Don’t overtax the friendship with your own needs.

Remember that friendships require both give and take.

At the same time, it’s never too late to pick up a new friend or even a group of them. Here are a few friend-finding suggestions:

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Attend community events

— Get together with a group of people working toward a goal that you believe in, such as an election or the cleanup of a natural area. Find a group with similar interests in an activity, such as reading, sports, crafting or gardening.

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Volunteer

— Offer your time or talents at a hospital, place of worship, museum, community center, charitable group or other organization. You can form strong connections when you work with people who have mutual interests.

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Take up a new interest

— Take a college or community education course to meet people who have similar interests. Join a class at a local gym, senior center or community fitness facility.

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Join a faith community

— Take advantage of special activities and get-to-know-you events for new members.

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Take a walk

— Put on some good shoes and keep your eyes open. Chat with neighbors who also are out and about, or head to a popular park and strike up conversations there.

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Think beyond two legs

— Whether it has four legs or even wings, a pet can provide many of the same companion benefits as human friendships can.

Loneliness vs. being alone

It’s important to not confuse loneliness with being alone. You can feel lonely in a crowd, just as you can feel perfectly content by yourself. If you know you have a solid support system waiting in the wings, you’re more likely to be able to navigate the alone times with ease or even pleasure.

While the health benefits of friendships are considerable, time spent alone can be a valuable asset. Use this time to be productive or to invest in yourself — recharge, pursue a solitary hobby, meditate, indulge in a daydream or even plan how to pursue that dream in the future.

 

[Source: Mayo Clinic ]